>>387
I can relate to this in a way. I feel an enormous psychological pressure when talking to someone to make sure that they are at comfort, are enjoying the conversation and just generally are "cool with me". This does lead me to happily engage in small talk and express interest in whatever they're interested in, but unlike you that doesn't make me feel like I'm not being true to myself. I find people interesting, and I want them to like me. But I do experience the feeling of playing character occasionally, and it always makes me feel sick. It's like I see myself from the other person's point of view, and suddenly I talk and act in a weird way. I wouldn't say this has much to do with "societal pressure", it's just my brain that's malfunctioning.
But what really bothers me is the anxiety I get from social interaction. And that's why I like small talk; it's not about the trivial subject for me, it's about establishing the tone of the conversation, seeing the mood of the person I'm talking to and making sure that he doesn't hate my guts yet.

yeah, that's a good way of putting it. "playing a character." i suspect this feeling is pretty common in the modern day era. true connections are very rare these days, or idk, i feel like they are. it feels like when i meet someone new, i dont have much in common with them, and that feeling gets stronger as i get older. i once had a conversation with someone about those rare connections you have with people where you don't feel like you're playing a character, you can be yourself and relax. these days i wonder, what am i adding to someone's life and what are they adding to mine? i feel like the societal definition of true friendship and human connection has become outdated or replaced with something artificial, and that makes me feel alone sometimes. maybe i really am becoming a hermit.

>>389
Yeah, normal-fags cannot accept anything outside of their narrow worldview. It forces me to wear a mask for stuff to not go by the wayside at work and university. I sometimes question why I ever put on the mask, but I know how much I would want to tell off a lot of people. With a lot of these normalfags, they step on everyone's toes, even other normaloids. They are just waiting for someone to say something because they have already prepared their lies.

>>387
That's one of the main reasons why i liked halloween, Because dressing up made me anonymous. I didn't exactly "play the character" i dressed up as, I just got to be invisible or to say and act diffrently and if i fucked up socally well no one would know it was me and i got a fresh start once the costume came off.

(2.78 MB )

>>414
Recently I found out that anonymity used to play a big part in the carnival of Venice. During the festivities people would wear masks, becoming unrecognizable which made distinctions of social class not matter. It was also an opportunity to act irreverently and criticize the authorities at no consequence (this was actually tolerated).

(124.46 KB )

Conversations about masks always tended to have a sort of distant, cold feeling to me. It's a topic that is deeply important for me, but I've never once met somebody whom I could relate to on the topic.
For me, masks and the concept of having no or an interchangeable identity is a core aspect of who I am as a person. For a good chunk of my life, I've never been "myself" with anybody. Where my experiences seem to differ is that I still do this online, and in anonymous spaces. This is because I LIKE having that mask. Having that mask, having the veil of anonymity, a fictional name and a picture that isn't your face, gives me a method to dehumanize myself.
I've always quite admired men who were so heroic as to be indecipherable from the idea of heroics as their being. Men so strong, so stoic, quiet, considerate and selfless that conceptions of "themselves" as a human being no longer occur to them. I'm not a very good person, but I strive to be the best person that anybody has ever met in their entire life. The most kind, the most considerate, the most heroic and selfless person they've ever been witness to. By changing who I "am", and by putting on that mask, I can render myself nonhuman, filtered down only to an idea. The idea of a hero, of a good person, of unfiltered goodness. I am not any of those things, but I can emulate those things by becoming them for the people around me.
By doing this, I can shed my human form and become what I truly wish to be-- an idea. I ENJOY the mask. In the times that I wonder what's below it, I will take it off and find nothing. I am the mask. I am the idea.

I don't know if this is as weird as I think it is or how common it is but that's how I see it at least.

>>421
At first I really wanted to call you a sociopath, but I kind of get what you're trying to say... I seriously doubt people will see you as so virtuous to be considered the "best person they've ever encountered" but there's still a nobility in trying to present an ideal for others to strive to, like how a parent presents themselves to a child (the only example I think would actually work). Again, I don't know why you're doing this; if it's solely for your own gratification to make people believe this lie I'm gonna call a stone a stone and say you're a psychopath.
You seem kind of misguided though. People don't think about you as often as you'd anticipate. They're all wrapped up in their own bullshit. Especially if you're being stoic, quiet, like you said, I doubt a lot of people would give you a second thought. It's funny to think this level of self importance probably wouldn't even reveal itself without anonymity. Just imagine telling the people around you the truth, what you just told all of us. They'd think you were full of yourself. That's another thing. Everyone thinks their shit doesn't stink. I can safely say you don't speak for me on this topic.

(179.30 KB 909x879 )

>>437
A psychopath? I suppose that's possible. Personally, I believe I simply have a very damaged sense of self and have throughout my life patched it together with several less-than-perfect methods. Perhaps I didn't express myself properly, but I don't mean that literally every person I meet should think highly of me. I simply desire to leave this world having made the lives of the people deeply involved with my own better. I have been described as "cruel to be kind" so I'm sure you have some sort of point, but to many people in my life I am an example to follow, and I understand the responsibility of that position. Is the man who has evil thoughts and makes evil choices lesser than the man who has evil thoughts, yet makes good choices in spite of their own evil nature? Is a man who thinks no evil, and does no evil more purely good? I think so, but I also think that one who has not experienced the temptations of the Devil can never enter the kingdom of Heaven. All of Man is deeply flawed, mistaken, foolish, and outright egotistical. I am fully aware that I am no exception, but I try my hardest to be an example of the contrary. Because for others who are unable to learn it themselves, they need an example that it's possible for anybody to be "good". To them, I am proof of that. That is my mask, and it is my responsibility. To me, what that mask means to others is the world. More than what I might "actually be", because if you peel back the layers, nobody is truly good, and nobody is truly evil. Only lost.

>>421
I have come to realise there are two versions of myself. My IRL self and my internet self. Both meet up at certian points but they branch off at seperate points. I don't behave in the same way i do here on 22chan as i do IRL. (not that i'm a faggot or a normalnigger)
It's not like a split personality, More like IRL is the mask at some points and my true self in a sense is here. Anonimity made me free of the limitations of the flesh and the chains of morality and such. (in a way that works in conjunction with the rules of the site.
I explained it better on the old site but i forgot what i wrote and its probably lost to time so i might sound like an idiot.