>>978
I've had many such cases, or rather attempted cases. I'd try to make friends when I was a lot younger and the parents or teachers would always break it up/ward them off. So I ended up always being alone because I was always viewed as the delinquent.
What upsets me is that nobody believed me as a kid. I'd only ever get into fights or arguments because people would tease or beat me horribly, and my natural reaction is to argue or fight back. Of course I'd get in trouble for doing so though. I'd never get heard out or have the time of day spent on me because of it, people just assumed I liked picking fights.
This continued pretty much all the way into secondary school, tried to make a couple friends but the people from my primary were there so they'd still bully me. My reputation was made within the first couple of months of being there and remained for the remaining 6 years that I was there.
I think having an autism diagnosis helped in some regards. Teachers stopped looking at me as the kid who just wants to cause trouble to the kid "with problems", so they were more lenient to me. Still didn't hear me out or believe me though. The students still bullied and isolated themselves from me so from about the end of the first year until the end of the sixth I became the quiet kid.
A similar thing happened, though not to such an extent. Again, it replays in my head almost daily.
>in my final year of secondary school
>don't know any of my teacher's names
>don't know any of my classmate's names
>forgetting even those who I went to primary with
>spend my time drawing or practicing copperplate or runes, whatever I had my eye on at the time instead of studying for final exams
>wasn't going to go to uni anyway so who cares
>in language class
>girl I've never spoken to before, don't know her name, don't recognise her face at all
>hair dyed blonde, cute chubby, smiley and kind
>we get paired together for some exercise
>have to talk about what we want to do after school in the language we're studying
>she's very bubbly and nice, talking to me from the get go
>I respond with my usual "yeah.." or "mm"
Thing is, I'd never get paired with anybody. It was as if the teachers were excluding me themselves from talking to others, so this to me was practically foreign and I didn't really know what to do.
>Her:"So Anon, what is it you want to do?"
>Me:"Um.. I'm not really sure. Maybe history or anthropology"
>Her:"Anthropology? What kind of qualifications do you need for that?"
>Me:"I'm not sure. I'm guessing history and some kind of science though."
>Her:"That seems really interesting, what makes you want to do that?"
>Me:"Just seems right to me I suppose. What do you want to do?"
>Her:"I want to work in a beautician/salon"
>Me:"Nice."
>Her:"Yeah, I'm doing an apprenticeship at the minute and it's really fun!"
>Me:"Do you get paid well for it? I can only imagine myself working if I get paid well"
>Her:"Yeah, for what it is I suppose I get paid well, but-"
>she gets cut off mid sentence by the teacher telling us to split up, write about what happened, then hand it up to her before class ends
This was probably about 15 or 20 minutes max in an hour long class and it's replaying in my mind constantly. Not sure if this is a sign that I'm pathetic or what, but these moments are rare in my life so it's more or less all I have. Hoping that someone else itt can relate.