>>472
I got a hoodie so I think I am safe and toasty now.

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Holidays mostly suck ass

>>687
this is why i say, make up your own holidays lol like festivus and if people ask gaslight them and pretend your fake holiday is real.

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>>688
So jewish

>>688
The holidays should be some good times of peace. If you are doing festive events out of obligation, I think you are missing the point. If you do anything, do it out of genuine belief and not out of obligation to appease some normalfag.

>>599
sometimes i express my honest feelings on something and it gets on other people's nerves for some reason. i can be a depressive kind of person but i don't really understand why expressing negative emotions, even if they're not directed towards anyone, gets a bad reaction from others.

also, this has been getting on my nerves for a while now, but mental illness or neurodivergence acceptance is not an invitation to be an antisocial or mean asshole.

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How do you guys deal with social isolation?
I know on some instinctual level we have a need for companionship, but at the same time I feel no desire to acquiesce to the demands of society in order to achieve it. I don't care how I present myself in public, or how stilted I am when speaking to people for this reason, because I know I'd rather be alone than waste my time with all the bullshit other people bring. Socialization hinges on putting on a front for others therefore anyone I would meet wouldn't connect with me.
I feel like I'm fighting a battle between my instinctual and rational thoughts and it's beginning to wear down my sanity. I hate them all and I also hate myself. The whole paradoxical nature of it all just pisses me off and I'm wondering if anyone is going through something similar. Probably not because I doubt this will make sense to anyone but me, but that's okay.

>>680
There is no good way of dealing with social isolation because it is not a good situation to be in. It increases your risk for health risk. I think the best thing to do is to get the most clarity on your situation so you know the solution you need.

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>>680
I promise you anon, what you're experiencing is chronic amongst humanity. These concerns of yours have entered the mind of almost every single person on this planet at least once. This is a problem that I myself have faced for almost my entire life. And for that, I have one thing to say to you; you're thinking about it wrong. You are not a victim of "normalfags" or regular people.
You're right, there is this sort of double faced "game" that people play in social situations. A kind of awful dick measuring contest, constantly. It's horrible, and it's not something I choose to entertain myself. Do you find yourself wondering how hard it must be to find somebody that's actually authentic? Somebody honest, who doesn't play those games? Everybody likes authenticity, and yet, our social lives are filled with plastic fakeness at every turn? It doesn't make any sense, except it does.
Nobody likes playing this social game. Nobody except the narcissistic and self obsessed. Everybody wishes they could be "authentic", and that they could find somebody who is "authentic".
So, what's stopping you from being that authentic person? Naturally, you would be afraid of others not liking you, but truly that is only a symptom of the problem, rather than the source. I can speak from experience, and I promise you brother please believe me, people are attracted to honesty. You do not need to play this game to be socially successful. You simply need to be honest, fair, and good hearted. People of high quality will find themselves inextricably attracted to you, pulled towards your presence. BECAUSE you're honest! Your honesty will terrify some, irritate others, and attract many. It's always going to be a mixed bag.
But-- a problem. You cannot truly be honest with others if you hate yourself, and you admit that you do hate yourself. And thusly, the true problem is discovered. All of us here on 22 are socially isolated, and many here hate themselves. I believe that there is a connection, in that people who hate themselves, and force themselves to behave and act differently around others, actually push people away. People are attracted to good qualities, such as honesty, fairness, morality, intelligence, etc. It's very difficult to have those qualities fully and truly if you hate yourself.
I know that you reading this probably won't solve anything, but if I have one piece of advice for you, anon, it's this;
Love Yourself. Learn to like yourself, learn to respect and appreciate yourself. If you love yourself, you will become okay with others not accepting you, and if you're okay with others not accepting you, then you have more social freedom than even the most powerful normalfag. Because you will then be the arbiter of your own social life, not a victim of it. Honesty trumps all.
Godspeed brother.

>>666
when I was a kid the internet to me was just whatever flash browser game I was playing at the time and nothing more.
When I was a teen the internet was something mysterious and magical. Something to be explored with many cool sekrit websites with sekrit cool clubs to discover.
Now as a young adult just like you OP the internet feels largely dead to me. The novelty and magic is gone knowing that most of the internet is just meaningless bot traffic, retards flinging shit at eachother in meaningless arguments always trying to have the last 'gotcha' reply or online influencers/ecelebs trying to sell you some trash or waste your time with meaningless often faked 'internet drama' or pointless shit like 10 minute videos where they just recite some twitter screencap or stupid 8hour long 'analysis' videos where they just repeat the plot of <insert media> without adding any meaningful commentary. It feels like there's barely anyone genuine left. People figured out that you can make easy money online and since than grifters have taken over

>>672
I can relate to this post. Grifters are probably the most obvious sign the internet isn't what it used to be. You know grifting is bad when e-begging is no longer shamed. I can understand giving creative people money, but there should be humility, not greed. Greed ruins so many things.

>>673
It seems that things always go bad once money gets involved. I guess it was inevitable that things would end up like this

>>672
>novelty and magic is gone
exactly. there's this essence of authenticity that is harder to find nowadays. you look at old forums and people had more character, more interesting and novel things to say, and were less jaded. online propaganda and bot spam is demoralizing and it's hard for authenticity to get the traction it needs to sustain itself.

it feels like people are more pressured to fit in and demonstrating creativity is punished or not rewarded as much as it should be. no one was as judgemental back then as they are now on the modern internet, at least based on what i observe.

>>675
I get that being a wage slave sucks but the internet needs to be selective of who they reward with internet fame. The way total hacks are reward for mediocrity really shows me how normalfags outnumber non normalfags.

>>364
The people my age i met during family gatherings are normalnigger trash in the purest sense. Terminally online, 1000 social media accounts, What normalniggers classify as "zoomers" in their shit slang if you know what i mean. I talk to them about the stuff they enjoy or can relate to, they ignore me to my face. If i had social media it would be diffrent in there eyes i guess? I hated hout they pressured a family member i just met who fought in 'nam and didnt have social media. They railroaded him into downloading facebook so he could conmect with his old buddies. He was happy after the fact but facebook isn't exactly a healthy app. When they where pressuring him, he was uncomfortable and kind of shaking and when i tried to step in i was told i was being a downer and i just got dismissed. I guess its the same with the older folk (caught up in their own little worlds) but that guy i met was neat and had a bunch of stories. I guess family doesn't have to be in the blood?

For as long as I can remember, I've always hated going to my yearly family reunion. I have never connected with anyone in my extended family on anything. I barely talk the whole time I'm there. It feels like the only reason I keep on going is out of love for my Dad. Of course he wants me to be close with my family, as he is, but I can't help but feel that each time I'm going as an accessory to him, that all my relatives don't see me as an individual, but as my Dad's son, and that my absence reflects badly on him and would call into question his efficacy as a parent.

There was a time where I didn't go for several years. Each year following I was told how much my family missed me and eventually I caved into going again, only to get the same empty response from them: all small talk, just feigning interest. The year before I took my break I spent the majority of my time sat in a hammock reading the novels I had brought and read both of them from beginning to end in a single day. After the years had passed and I came back, someone told me about how they saw me laying there that year and were curious about me and why I disappeared, how that year had been the first year they went and consequently their first and only impression of me. I think if I hadn't been in such a state of anxiety from just being there I would've cried.

I just prefer to be alone and most of the time I don't care if it means there's something wrong with me. And it's not out of hatred for my family; I've simply never felt comfortable in a single interaction with them.

>>657
do you know if specific people in your family that might care enough to ask where you've been and missing your company or is it just impossible to tell?

>>657
Normalfags are so fair-weather people it is painful. When things are good with you, they don't show you that you matter. They only appreciate the theoretical idea of you, not the actual you. Being around normalfags who don't care about you makes me feel even more alone. The gatherings don't matter and are more appearance of family togetherness rather than an actual gathering,

>>502
My go-to fatboy food is called the famous bowl. The famous bowl includes creamy mashed potatoes, sweet corn, and chicken nuggets layered together, then drizzled with homemade gravy and topped with a perfect blend of three shredded cheeses. So, mashed potatoes with gravity and an assortment of toppings. I mainly go to this food for the gravy and mashed potatoes. It is comfort food for me because it is a food I love the food regardless of how I am feeling. Making food myself is fun, and I'm relaxed when I eat good food like the famous bowl.

I have a strange comfort food i eat every now and then, A meatball sub with ranch and pickels. You'd think it'd taste gross but its quite great.

>>504
I put pretzels in my soup, so I don't think it is weird. Pickles are great, so I don't blame you. What does your food taste like?

>>505
Lately I've been putting pretzels in everything from mashed potatoes to ice creme. I think I am going insane over pretzels. I think I am a pretzels addict because it always complements the food to me.

Today, I was thinking about whether I could eat either cookies or cake without gaining weight. As of today, I was thinking cake would be pleasurable to eat because of the amount of food. The cake is also viewed as a treat, which made it more alluring in my mind. What food would /yu/ eat more if they did not gain weight?

>>474
It does sound like you should fix your back problem. Insufficient sleep really sucks and it hurts memory in my experience. Maybe a doctor could help?

I am having caffeine withdrawals. It is something I have to deal with but I hope I can keep my head up high.

>>510
have you considered drinking decaf to ween yourself off?

>>511
I am out of caffeinated drinks in the fridge so I am going with sweet tea for now.

>>512
Update on the caffeine situation. My appetite is still larger than it used to be, but I can recognize it's due to a lack of caffeine rather than real hunger. The situation is under control for now.